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英文简历中不该出现的话

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  致命的大错
  "Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10."
  "Qualifications: No education or experience."
  "I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy."
  "My compensation should be at least equal to my age."
  "Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC."
  "Fired because I fought for lower pay."
  "Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 65" .
  "Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date."
  "Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near."
  "Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia. I prefer to elaborate privately."
  打字错误与语法错误
  "Here are my qualifications for you to overlook."
  "Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer."
  "I am a rabid typist."
  "Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981."
  "After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to
  pursue a new line of work."
  "Accounting cleric."
  "As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments."
  "Suspected to graduate earlynce analyzing investments."
  "Suspected to graduate early next year."
  "Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets."
  "Proven ability to track down and correct erors."
  "Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department."
  "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details."
  "Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school."
  不应有的幽默
  "Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house."
  "Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting." (Translation: Short-order cook.)
  "But wait...theres more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing that is second nature."
  "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse."
  "My fortune cookie said, Your next interview will result in a job-and I like your company in particular."
  "Title: Another resume from the Profiles in Excellence series."
  "Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it."
  "Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks."
  "Lets meet so you can ooh and ahh over my experience."


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